stopping for my usual fix of bartender blitz..

[darren_stranger]

Yesterday, i started writing a lengthy post about my relationship with alcohol, but i couldn't find time to finish it.  In fact i'm far too busy to even stop and think what i was trying to say, so i might as well abandon it and start again.

In short, perhaps i should just say that i think it's time again to cut back a little on my drinking.


It's not that i drink too often (as in every other day) or that my behaviour is exceptionally embarrassing when i do (beyond the odd dancefloor tragedy and semi-coherent conversation), but i'm finding that a night out is just a little too frequently paid for with the loss of the whole next day, usually from my precious weekend, to hangover and general seediness.

Now, i'm old enough to decide for myself when i would like to enjoy the pure pleasure of giddy drunkenness, and there are certain situations and occasions that are best appreciated in a euphoric rush of intoxication.  This is not what concerns me so much.  It's more the other times, when i'm not really planning to drink so much, but find myself doing so either out of habit, as a mood enhancer or just to fill time.  It seems to be happening that way quite a bit, and i've been pondering why.

One of the main causes i've identified lately is that i'm often using it as a means to get past the fact that i'm too tired and have lost the enthusiasm to go out, especially at the end of a week of 6am rises and too few hours of sleep.  Sometimes i feel like i could just as easily just go to bed, but i know i've been looking forward to it (sometimes all week) and will be miserable if i stay in, so i have to dose myself up with caffeine and acohol to get back into the mood, which usually sets the trend for the rest of the night.  Then, often following on from this, i'll find myself downing drinks robotically in between bands or while sitting around at a club.  That's partly a killing time factor, together with the habit of being used to always having a drink in my hand, and partly a repetition of the need to prop up my mood to enjoy the band or have a dance.  That last aspect plays on my mind a bit too, as a question of whether i've trained myself over the years to *need* that level of drunkenness to have a good time.  Similarly, i'd like to know than my social skills don't necessarily come out of a bottle as well.

So, i think it's time to consciously drop back my intake a bit, not to the point of total sobriety (though i know it could come to that if i keep pushing my liver too hard) but at least to the point where i am content to stay on the near side of the line between 'happy' and 'drunk'.  For one thing, going back to drinking light beer again (which i abandoned when money became tighter this year) will be a start, though ultimately i'll have to find a way of working out what to do with my hands when i don't have a drink in them (i'm so glad i never took up smoking).  How to get around the tiredness problem is something i'll have to think about, probably with lifestyle changes to improve my energy levels (quitting my job is the most tempting option, but not particularly practical) and i think i'm going to have to re-think my approach to nights out, making the focus more for socialising (which is the main point anyway) and if i'm not in the mood to dance or slam or whatever then i'm just not.

By the way, this isn't intended as an invitation for people to remind me any time they see me a little 'tired and emotional' while out and about.  It's more to remind myself, as a sort of public domain post-it note to bear in mind.

Transmission ends.

Comments

[ms-kismet.livejournal.com]

Perhaps a change of diet might belp with the energy levels?

[strang-er.livejournal.com]

Well, i need more iron and have been trying to incorporate that (last time i gave blood they told me i was borderline anaemic, and that with the new limits coming in this year i'd have been too low in haemoglobin to even be allowed to donate). i might feel better if i made a habit of gorging on the flesh of slaughtered beasts, but i'm not willing to do that so i'm eating a lot of beans and greens instead.

But i think it's partly that i'm getting too old to get by on as little sleep as i used to. Early nights during the week are going to have to become more common i think.

[ms-kismet.livejournal.com]

Just remember if you are trying to take on extra iron that your body will be needing extra vit C to absorb it too. :)

[http://users.livejournal.com/raven_/]

I feel your pain.

These days, I get hungover from the smoke in a venue, and I can't smoke at all myself.

Most of the time, I just stay in, on the couch, because I'm just too fucking tired to move, and I don't have the time to spend a day of my weekend recovering.

*hugs*

[damien-wise.livejournal.com]

a week of 6am rises and too few hours of sleep
Think I've spotted the problem! ;)
I don't think humans were designed to wake-up this early on a regular basis. Sure, some people may tell themselves they're "morning people" but they're usually the grumpy ones, and no wonder.
(Bleh, I'm hardly one to give advice about sleep disorders.)

Seriously, though...there's a big link between energy levels, metabolic rate and the way the body processes alcohol and recovers from it. Good luck re-establishing that balance. :)

[severina-242.livejournal.com]

I feel much the same way myself - time to do things is becoming more precious than getting drunk the night before. And the day after is a write off because my hangovers are much worse the older I get. Plus I get irritated that I can't have coherent conversations whilst drunk anyway, so I've been winding it down slowly. Sadly it's meant staying away from clubs. I've found it's harder than I thought - old habits die hard - plus the 'drinky, drinky' culture and stress of my arse fucking advertising job don't help. Plus I actually like beer. Light beers may be the way to go, but there aren't many decent light beers out there.

I have resolved to try and limit myself to 3 *at the most* drinks (not including things like martinis) if I'm out and 1 if I'm at home.

PS

[severina-242.livejournal.com]

I find good conversation helps to stop me getting bored and mentally shrugging and hitting the piss whilst out - not that there isn't good conversation to be had out there in the Goth Community, it's just that it's either too loud at clubs, or I've been too shy to speak to people.

Perhaps I need to establish a 'Gothics club' for conversation and tea or something. Knitting optional.

Re: PS

[http://users.livejournal.com/raven_/]

Shall I pour?

Re: PS

[tcpip.livejournal.com]

I think frou-frou runs a "high tea gathering" at the Windsor..

Yes, the Windsor.

Re: PS

[severina-242.livejournal.com]

At $30, it's not something that I could do often.

And stop waving that Windsor carrot in front of my face ;-)

[kraant.livejournal.com]

I've found that sticking to orange juice while out and about helps a fair bit.

[strang-er.livejournal.com]

That would at least help with the 'drink in my hands' aspect, though i'd have to get past the metal objection to spending money on a non-alcoholic drink. In fact, i realised i've been drinking a bit more at clubs (ie Dream) following the discovery that it's cheaper to buy rum & coke than light beer. Perhaps i need to adjust my thinking to recognise that it's probably worth spending a little more to get *less* drunk.

Drinking water would be good too, but i've got an even bigger psychological anchor on the subject of paying for water (had a big argument at Dream a while ago with some 'friend of the management' who took it on himself to be the water police when i was filling up a glass in the sink - i was quite peeved to be accused of taking drugs just because i wasn't going to pay for water to rehydrate after spending money over the bar all night, but that's another rant).