weekend planning, such as it is

Have to go to a referee seminar tomorrow, so no Dream this week (was planning on it, but they always seem to have something against giving more than a few days' notice for these things). But judging from the Greenroom's ad, the Sinshifters might be on reasonably early on the bill for their big birthday gig tonight. If i can nail down a time and it's early enough, that might be a goer. (Will probably be something stupid like $12 just to see the one band, but i need to get out). Of course, something tells me i'm not going to end up going, so i probably shouldn't be listening to the Fireballs to get in the mood to be disappointed.

Failing that, i guess there's that Bit By Bats gig on Sunday arvo.

knew it

Dropped by the Greenroom on the way home. Entry's $20 and the Sinshifters aren't on until 2am. So much for that idea.

Then i remembered seeing someone posting about after-work drinks, but with trying to cram a day's LJ skimming into a few legitimate break times, i couldn't remember who, when or where. So instead i just hopped on a tram to Brunswick Street to go have a couple of beers by myself (something i used to enjoy, but have been doing far too much of lately).

Just as i was about to hop off at Brunswick Street, i spotted Roby sitting on the tram, but i was in such a foul mood by then that i didn't feel up to conversation so i just kept walking. So now i'm snubbing friends so i can go spend time brooding on my lack of social life - what the fuck is that about?

Three days back at work and i'm already into "how can i drag my arse into work all week if there's nothing to look forward to at the end of it?" mode. Thought it'd take at least 'til the end of the month.

God, this is pathetic. I spend so much time brooding about things i don't get to do because so little of my time belongs to me, then whenever i do get a bit of time of my own i can't think of what i want to do with it. I should be grabbing life by the balls while i'm still young (ish) and healthy but i'm just passing time waiting to get old, and the things that i am doing that should count as meaningful seem more like chore and obligation lately than something i'm passionate about. And just knowing that other people have real shit to deal with, whether chronic illness, crippling debt or giant fucking tidal waves, just makes it more pathetic and wasteful.

I'm sure i can find other things to whinge about, but i'm bored with that too so i think i'll just go up the pub.


(Edit - gee, that wasn't supposed to turn into that much of a whinge session, but i guess i had to get that out before i can start thinking how to fix some of these things).